The Interview
by oldscout1011
Summary: StarGate crossover. Jack conducts an interview. Contains The Interview and its follow ups. Minis. Complete
1. The Interview

Disclaimer: The characters don't belong to me, I'm just borrowing them for a very short time.

This is my first attempt at a drabble. I wrote this story because I was recently flamed that I _might _write a bad SGC story. Well, since I'd never written SGC, here it is.

ooOOoo

**The Interview  
By OldScout**

General O'Neill was told he'd been chosen to conduct this interview because of his experience dealing with the weird at the SGC. Nothing had prepared him for this. He looked at the petite woman sitting across the table. She looked hopelessly bored as she lounged in her chair, legs crossed at the knees, filing her nails

"Miss Summers, though some may find your adventures shopping in the Nation's Capital captivating...and I don't know why they call it the National Mall if there are no shops," He watched her look down at her feet and her new shoes. "And I really don't think we need to talk about your shoes again."

Did she just pout?

"I was told you would cooperate." He still had no idea why or how somebody named Buffy was the keeper of this particular secret. "Can you please just tell me what exactly destroyed Sunnydale?"

"Fine." Buffy smiled. "Sunnydale was destroyed by a magical amulet worn by an ensouled vampire."

"Oh, for crying out loud."

"Can I go now?"

ooOOoo

Finis.


	2. The Report

**The Report.  
by OldScout**

See chapter 1 for disclaimers.

AN: I did not originally plan to write a sequal to The Interview, but this just came to me. Enjoy.

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It was in the bowels of the Pentagon; a room that looked more like a set piece from "Doctor Strangelove". Time to report on his interview with Miss Summers; the Generals waited.

This had to be some sort of twisted initiation. He opened his notebook. The others prepared to take notes. "The key things I learned from Miss Summers are the National Mall is not a shopping center. All of her shoes must have at least three inch heels, even her work boots." One of the occupants was actually writing this down. "And it is nearly impossible to get 'goo' out of silk."

"Did she actually saying anything about the destruction of Sunnydale?" On of them asked.

"Yes." Jack watched them all prepare to take notes. "' Sunnydale was destroyed by a magical amulet worn by an ensouled vampire.'" Jack closed his notebook and waited to be dismissed then the questions started.

"What kind of amulet?"

"Did she give its provenance?"

"What was the name of the vampire?"

"Did she know what the amulet would do?

"Where there any other artifacts in play?"

"Whose side was the vampire working for?"

The questions kept coming.

Jack's only response "Oh, for crying out loud."

ooo00ooo

Finis.


	3. The Followup

Disclaimer: See chapter one for disclaimer. 

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**The Follow-Up  
by OldScout**

Jack sat with his arms folded on his desk and head down. He should have known something was wrong when got to work and was told Miss Summers was half an hour early instead of two hours late. He'd found Miss Dawn Summers waiting in his office. She was going through his desk.

At first he'd thought he'd have better luck with the teenage sibling. Perhaps he would have if he could get a word in edgewise. So far she'd asked for a tour of the Pentagon and for him to get her into The Air Force Academy. In less than ten minutes she'd mentioned Area 51, NORAD, Cheyenne Mountain and the Chair Force plus other things he didn't want to think about.

"Ah, Mister General, why are you banging your head on your desk? Should I call somebody?"

"Just shoot me." He groaned back.

**Finis**

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	4. The Followup Report

See Disclaimers in chapter 1.

O0oo0O

**The Follow-up Report.  
By OldScout**

"Congratulations, General, you've done a nice job."

Jack stared at the old Army General who'd asked to speak to him after the report. "Sir, I got nothing useful." He'd eventually gotten Dawn to mention something about the amulet and somebody who'd thought he was a vampire.

"But you have, son. We now know there was an ugly amulet worn by a vampire named Spike and he was probably working with Miss Summers. When I interviewed the elder Miss Summers all I got was a two hour discussion about why Starbucks calls their small coffee Tall."

"She blew me off and sent her sister."

The General handed over an envelope. Time stamped surveillance photos from the Visitor's parking lot showed Buffy Summers wearing a strapless sundress sitting in the passenger seat of an Eclipse convertible. A close up showed she'd been reading a book on clinical physiology.

"She was telling you she likes and trusts you, General."

The last photo showed Dawn in the driver's seat and both women smiling up at the camera.

"Better call The Mountain, O'Neill, it looks like you're going to be in town for awhile."

**Finis.**

O0oo0O 


	5. The Meeting

See chapter one for disclaimers.

-+TT+-  
**  
The Meeting  
By OldScout**

"Shouldn't we brief him? General O'Neill does have clearance."

"I think one of the reasons Miss Summers likes him is because he is not part of the D.R.I, General. If he shows up fully briefed, it'll ruin him for her."

"So O'Neill is the sacrificial mouse."

"I doubt he'd like being referred to as a cat toy, General, but the analogy does seem to fit."

"Thank you for your time, Mr. President."

-+TT+- 


	6. The Request

See chapter 1 for disclaimers

oo(())00  
**  
The Request   
By Old Scout**

"I'm doing fine, Sir." Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter stated. "And yourself?"

"Just peachy." Jack tried to sound cheerful as he spoke into the phone. "Hey, Carter, I was wondering if you could look up somebody for me."

"Sorry, Sir, I can't."

"What? Why not? I haven't even said who."

"We have strict instructions from General Furcifer not to engage in any investigations for you while you're on T.D.Y."

"Oh, for crying out loud!"

"Have you seen his fork collection, Sir? What's up with that?"

oo(())00


	7. The Indoctrination

See chapter 1 for disclaimers. 

00OO00

** The Indoctrination  
by Old Scou**t

"In reality most fairy tales are based on truth." Buffy told Jack. "There's a lot of stuff out there people don't want to know about, like vampires, werewolves and other things."

"Riiiiiight." Jack tried his best not to throw his notes at her and storm out of the room. "And I suppose the Easter Bunny is real too."

Buffy seemed to sink into her chair. "Yea, um, well. about that..."

"Wait." Dawn looked up from the Steven King novel she'd been reading. "Buffy, what happened to the Easter Bunny?"

"Hey, it was an honest mistake." Buffy defended.

"Oh, for crying out loud."

00OO00


	8. The Homecoming

--&&--  
**The Homecoming.  
By OldScout.**

"Welcome home, Sir."

"Thanks, Carter." Jack replied as they walked down the main corridor of the SGC.

"So what exactly where you assigned to?" She was dieing to find out what had Jack sounding so crazed whenever he called.

"No clue." Jack stated. "It was either some kind of psych test or initiation into the Generals' Club."

"What'd they do?"

"I can't really go into details, you know, security and all."

"If it was just a test why the security?"

"I guess they don't want people gossiping about it so the next sucker gets forewarned." Jack replied. He wasn't about to admit that he'd been starting to believe.

Carter was about to say something else when the speakers started blaring "Unscheduled off world activation!" Sounds of gun fire, zat fire, explosions and other commotion could be heard from the gate room up ahead. She glanced at Jack to see how he was reacting to this homecoming. He was grinning.

"Sir?"

"It's good to be home." Jack said as he pulled his sidearm.

**Finis.**

--&&--


	9. The Reference

oo00O00oo

**The Reference.  
By Old Scout.**

One year later.

Jack was doing his dreaded paperwork. Somebody had used him as a personal reference to the Air Force Academy. He looked at the envelope but couldn't for the life of him figure out who he knew young enough to be going who wouldn't have already talked to him about it. Enough suspense he slid the application out of the envelope.

"Oh, for crying out loud."

The name, Dawn Summers.

Finis.  
The End.  
That's it.  
Complete.  
(Except for the DVD extra.)

oo00O00oo 


	10. DVD Extra

AN: I just wanted to thank everybody who read and reviewed these minis. I really do appreciate it. I'm glad so many people enjoyed this bit of silliness.

DVD Extra.  
Chapter 3, The Follow-Up was originally a longer piece. I guess I just needed to let Dawn go and see what happened before I could boil it down to the short format. So here is the deleted scene. Enjoy.

  
**The Follow up. (Long version)  
By Old Scout**

"She's here already?" Yesterday she was two hours late, now she was a half hour early. "You're sure it's Miss Summers?"

"Yes, Sir. She checked out." The Sentry said. "She seemed quite exited to be here."

Jack found a teenage girl with long brown hair sitting at his desk going through his drawers. "Yeep!" The girl yelped, jumped to her feet and slammed the drawer shut. "Hi."

Jack glared.

The girl edged away from the desk. "Sorry about that. I was just a.." she swallowed something. "Looking for some gum."

"You're not Buffy Summers."

She stepped forward and offered her hand. "Dawn Summers. Buffy couldn't make it so she asked me to come." She smiled triumphantly.

"General O'Neill." Jack offered before sitting at his small desk. "And you know about.."

"This is sooo cool being in the Pentagon." Dawn said as she sat down in the guest chair. "Isn't this office really small for a General?"

"Well, I'm only here tempor.."

"Hey, have you ever been to Area Fifty One? Andrew swears there's a real spaceship there."

"No, I..."

"Wait you're from Colorado Springs." She said enthusiastically.

"How'd you know?"

"The coffee mug." She pointed to his Tommy's Hockey Shop mug. "Oh, do you work for the Air Force Academy? Do you think you could get me in there? Do they need linguists?"

"No, I don't work…"

"Oh, my God, you must work for NORAD." Dawn practically squealed. "I should have known that's why you're interested in Sunnydale."

"Yes, well what can you tell me about the Amulet?" Jack said trying to get the girl focused.

"Oh, it was ugly. They really didn't say where it came from." She looked around the office. "This is just sooo cool. Can you give me a tour? And you know not just the regular tour places but some of the cool war rooms and stuff?"

"About the amulet…"

"Oh, oh,.." Dawn sat back and pointed at Jack. "I have a question for you. Why does Riley call the Air Force the Chair Force?"

"I really don't know…"

"You know if I don't go to the Academy I could still go to O.C.S. after college." Dawn said. "Hey what difference does it make? Do Academy officers get better jobs then O.C.S. officers? Would I have to cut my hair? Because I don't know if I could do that."

"Not if you keep it up while on duty. Now about this vampire who wore the Amulet?"

"Oh, that would be sooo cool." Dawn said. "But it must suck for the guys that they have to cut their hair. Do they ever get mad about that? Do any of the women ever cut their hair like Demi Moore did in that movie? She looked really cut but you know Buffy could still so kick her ass."

"Miss Summers, the vampire?"

"Oh, yeah. Spike. He was really cool." She reflected for a second. "At least to me. Of course that was because he was so into Buffy. That was kind of gross and weird. She was always threatening to kick his ass, then asking him to watch me. One time he had this ro…ah, doll made up that looked just like her. It was pretty sick. But he was always nice to me."

"And where did.." Jack began again his head was starting to hurt.

"Hey, what do they really do in Cheyenne Mountain? Now that the cold war is over it's not like we need to keep watching Canada for thousands of incoming missiles or anything. Andrew says you guys have a transmogrifier that can duplicate people and junk. Ah, Mister General, why are you banging your head on your desk? Should I call somebody?"

"Just shoot me." Jack groaned.

**Finis.**


End file.
